This week the league was left a pretty stirring quote from one Stephen Hawking. In it Mr. Hawking states “If aliens visit us, the outcome would be much as when Columbus landed in America, which didn’t turn out well for the Native Americans.” Obviously Mr. Hawking has never heard of a mysterious group of Galaxy Defenders who call themselves the Men In Black. Have you?
Recently a large cardboard box was found on my front steps. It had no return address, no postage and no markings of any kind that would let me trace it's origins. I opened it up and inside were a strange bunch of sensitive materials. I'm telling you about this under anonymity, so please try keeping this on the down low for everyone's safety.
The first thing I pulled out of the box were a set of classified "Mission Journals" from the 90s. These illustrated journals must have been written as a record of what happened to individual agents as they proceeded to guard against extra-terrestrial violence. These may have been used as training manuals for future rookie agents to learn from other's mistakes and victories. This is only speculation though.
Next up was a trilogy of documentaries. These 3 are chilling videos of some of the Men In Black's most amazing triumphs. From giant bugs to a time traveling assassin. Little is known as to why the MiB would record their exploits. Once again these may have been used as a learning tool. Maybe someday these will come to light and be shown to the general public so we can fully understand the extent of danger the world is in? So when a future extinction level event occurs we don't fear them, we cheer them.
This item has to be one of the strangest! It is an agent simulator. This program simulates an Alien Escape and tests how agents would perform in high stress situations. Recruits are required to stop aliens from blowing up the Earth with a ship based weapon called the Class 7 Ozone Demogrifier. They are tested on investigative talents and recognizing alien threats out in the field.
With all the high stress situations and elite exhaustive training the MiB are still able take time to cut loose and relax. Otherwise I'm sure they would go crazy and possibly lose focus during a critical mission. We wouldn't want that would we?
I am not sure why I was chosen to receive this box, but let me tell you Mr. Hawking, if hostile aliens did come to Earth the Men In Black are our first, last and only line of defense against the worst scum of the universe! With all the above materials at their disposal the MiB have protected us since the 50s and are ready for anything. tonight I can go to bed soundly just knowing.........
Check out these other great sites that talk about stuff? I can't remember what though?